Thursday, July 7, 2011

Harder Than the Years Past

Video gaming is a fascinating hobby that seems to become more and more demanding as it progressively matures into the future. There used to be a golden age when there were only two platforms that you have to worry but these days, there are about six of them. Thanks to the ever increasing rate of improved gaming technology, it seems like there is always something new around the corner when it comes to the hardware and of course, the never-ending list of potentials they bring encourage much creativity which then resulted into new games that come in huge numbers every year.

Before the "Wii U" was announced at E3 a month ago, when rumors of its pending arrival permeated the gaming universe, I remember a feeling of dread in my heart. As someone who is so keen about the hobby, that reaction was certainly unexpected and unhealthy. I remember telling a friend that I really don't feel like I want to chase any more new gaming platforms because I am happy with what I have right now. But such a point of view is certainly regressive and it is so against my own take on life. We shouldn't stop things from evolving because it is natural for them to keep changing for the better. I know the real reason why I just want things to slow down a bit when it comes to the constant jump from one platform generation to the next and it all has something to do with money - you know, it is that insignificant thing that makes the world round and gives it its glow.

I have made a lot of sacrifices in my life to accommodate my gaming hobby. I don't make much but I have spent a majority of what I have on it. Then a new game or machine is announced, and like a mass-produced industrial robot specifically created to do menial tasks, I would add them neatly into my Purchase List with that anticipation that I would still be alive when they finally become available so that I could happily pick them up to call them my own. Every so often, I would look at that long list and realize that for whatever good that the list was accomplishing, I was actually feeling defeated. The list is mocking me because in truth, it will never get shorter. At the end of the day, the list becomes a reminder of things that I potentially cannot have instead of the things that I potentially can touch. But I understand. I am greedy. Too greedy for the pleasures of this world, this life. I like this one exquisite flavor in particular and ever since I tasted it, I have been unwilling to let go. I have so much yet I have so little. So many others would love to be in my shoes but I know that they wouldn't wear my cap. I have created a meaning in my life through a collage of cartridges, circular discs, plastic cases, and saved data and they occupy the most significant portions of my memory. I throw away everything else... Almost everything else because they hold little value to me. I do feel that I am already there sometimes at that place where all is right with this existence that I have created for myself. I look at the walls around me and I do see the cracks and crevasses. Yes, there are days when I just feel tired and lost. It's time to hit that reset button.

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